Things I Hate: MGMT

The devil.

Yes. I hate MGMT. I find their music absolutely obnoxious. It drives me nuts. And the worst part is, is that when I listen to one of their songs (because one of my friends has their music on and I'm too polite to say, "FUCK NO WE ARE NOT LISTENING TO THIS SHIT!") it gets stuck in my head for days. IT. IS. TERRIBLE.

You know, I'm actually convinced that everyone hates MGMT's music. It's just that their music is so prevalent in our culture that it's easier to like their music rather than be tortured every time one of their songs comes on the radio. A stockholm syndrome of sorts. We have fallen in love with our tormentors, folks.

Enough of my ranting - let's get into WHY I hate MGMT.

There is really only one reason I hate the I-make-babies-cry music of MGMT. One reason only.

Their use of the synthesizer.

SO INCREDIBLY OBNOXIOUS.

It's as if they got high one day, discovered a synthesizer and was like, "WHOAAAAAA! DUDE! You have to fucking check this shit out!" and decided to use it in every song ever - thus giving some of their songs a bad disco sound. Just look at any of their songs and you'll find a synthesizer riff. There's one in every song they've ever created. I promise.

And it's not just that they use the synthesizer - it's that the sounds they use and the riffs and motives they come up with are so obnoxiously synthesizery. I'm pretty sure, when they were high, one of them was like, "No man. No. We have to let people know that this is a fucking synthesizer they're listening to. We need to make this thing say, 'HELLO I AM A MOTHERFUCKING SYNTHESIZER AND I AM HERE TO MAKE YOUR EARS BLEED. HAVE A NICE DAY' and then take it even further than that. You get what I'm sayin', man?"

MGMT? Tone down the synthesizer. Please. For the sake of my constantly bleeding ears, tone it down.